“I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that’s as unique as a fingerprint – and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of service…” - Oprah Winfrey

Who are the women in your life who have made a difference? Name the ones who have had an influence and contributed to your success in some way. Who are the ones you counted on to pick you up off of the ground when you felt like your dreams would never become a reality and gave you courage and encouragement?

I don’t know a woman who can’t name someone. Think about all of the times you have been helped in your career by a woman and you never let her know the difference she made. Really – how often has that happened?  When I was growing up I admired my high school math teacher Mrs. Riley. I was a friend of her daughter Kim and so I knew her long before I got to be in her math class. For all of the years I knew her it was clear to me that this was one special woman. The list of what made her so amazing is far too long to put in a blog. The point is that for years I had this woman in my life who, because of the way she approached the world made a difference in mine. When I look at the history of my life as a microcosm of all history – she is significant.

The reality is – I never told her how much I valued her as a role model, how important her influence was and how much her words of encouragement informed many of the decisions I made in my career.  Women like her are often shoulder to shoulder with us all of the time and its often we don’t recognize how much we learned from them, how important they were in our lives until long after they have moved away or taken another job. That is the very reason it is so wonderful that we have International Women’s Day and Women’s History Month to remind us to pause for a moment and honor the giants in history who advocated for women’s rights. But it is equally important to pause and acknowledge the women who are here with us now, today and thank them for their generosity of spirit, their encouragement for serving as supports and role models, mentors and champions. Often they go unrecognized. It’s good that we have a day set aside to stop and take stock  - to consider for a moment all of the gifts they have given us and to let them know that for all of the times we thought about how much they meant to us but never said a word we acknowledge them now.

Now, I challenge you all to honor a woman in your life who has inspired you to be great. Not just within the month of March, but every day.

So many people talk about how they hate to write, then they’ll proceed to say they have "zero writing skills". Are you one of those people? Do you know someone who professes that they can’t even write a simple “thank you” note?

If you can read and spell- you can write. Stop telling yourself that you will never be able to write – you are holding your self back. Saying that you “can’t write” is another way of saying – “ I don’t want to take the time to learn how to write well” or at least that is what I hear every time someone makes this statement. Writing is a task that is infiltrated in almost every job position you will have. Having exceptional writing skills will take you further into your career than you may think.

If you feel that you have zero writing skills there is a way to turn that situation around. Here are some ideas:

• Take a creative writing class. Many libraries, schools, arts centers offer writing classes. My advice is to sign up for one so that you can learn some key tips to writing well.
• Get a writing tutor – I have more than one friend who has met privately with a writing coach to sharpen their skills. A few months of an hour a week can make a big difference in getting you on track. It’s a great investment in yourself.
• Read books on business writing and do the exercises in them.
• Sign up for a series of webinars on the basics of writing.
• Find a friend who loves to write and ask them how they became a good writer.
• Chances are anyone who loves to write will tell you that it isn’t as easy as it looks. I know people who take up to four hours to write a 250-word blog but they do it. Why? Because they are proud of the finished product. Once they are published they feel they have shared something of value with the world.

One of my college professors said that there are three things you must do well in this life to succeed: read, write and speak. In fact, the college I attended lowered the highest achievable grade from an A+ to a C-  whenever a piece of work contained an incomplete sentence. In college I thought that was unfair but now it’s clear they were just preparing us for the real world. It’s possible to reduce your chances of advancing in your career by staying stuck in the spot of having zero writing skills.

Have you ever quit a job? Chances are if you have been in the workforce for over 10 years the answer is yes. Many who have exited actually left a person and not the work.

My good friend Jess gave up on her job because she could no longer take the stress of working with her boss. It was impacting everything from her health to her family.

Many people are passive; they are quiet about their frustration, stress or disappointment. Some leave for a better opportunity. Many leave for any opportunity or for nothing at all. They just have to get away from a dysfunctional stressful situation. What makes a good person resign?

The number one thing I hear people who couldn’t take it any more talk about is that they feel they can’t trust someone of influence in the workplace.

Here are six examples of ways that people drive good employees away:

1. They omit important information. Thinking that information is power they won’t tell their co-worker or the people working for them all of the information they need when they are assigned a project. The employee finds out after spending too much time on something that the job could have been done better and faster if only they knew what the boss said to the person passing along the instructions when the project was assigned.

2. They don’t tell the truth and they repeatedly get caught in a lie. And no one does anything about it.

3. They speak negatively of people. When this happens the employee wonders what is being said about them when they are not in the room.

4.Building relationships is not important. They don’t even try to know something about the people they are working with. I know someone who was called by the wrong name. No matter how many times she corrected her boss it go brushed off with the comment “I’m awful with names.”

5. They hold off on giving positive feedback. They won’t say “good job” at the moment it happens or in front of anyone else. They wait until an annual review or they say it in passing weeks after the event it makes people feel like the praise wasn’t really genuine.

6. They use silence as a weapon. Are weapons appropriate? No. But silence is a powerful one. Early in my career I worked for someone who would stop speaking to his staff for weeks at a time when something didn’t go his way. It created a punishing environment that drove talented people away.

Part of developing good employees is to model respectful communication that fosters an atmosphere to make people feel valued. Otherwise – good people are driven away.