What is one of the first things you ask someone when you meet them? Often it is “Where do you work?” Unfortunately, in today’s economy, unemployment is a serious problem, and this question can put someone in the uncomfortable position of saying that they do not have a job. If you know that you are going to be interacting with someone who is unemployed, try asking what field they are in, or what their interests are. 

Just because they are unemployed, does not mean they are uninvolved. They might be volunteering in their field or pursing worthwhile causes outside of the work world. Changing the language of your question allows them to contribute to the conversation even if they are not currently employed. And who knows, you may discover that they have skills that match a position you are looking to fill!

I’d like to share  a favorite poem about gossip that speaks volumes about the tremendous power of words and just how damaging they have the potential to be. It’s a great testament to why we should all do everything we can to not participate in gossip, and to intervene when others are engaging in it. 

MY NAME IS GOSSIP - Author Unknown

My Name Is Gossip. I have no respect for justice. I maim without killing. I break hearts and ruin lives. I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age. 

The more I am quoted the more I am believed. I flourish at every level of society. My victims are helpless. They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face. 

To track me down is impossible. The harder you try, the more elusive I become. I am nobody’s friend. Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same. I topple governments and ruin marriages. I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartache and indigestion. I spawn suspicion and generate grief. 

I make innocent people cry in their pillows. Even my name hisses. I AM CALLED GOSSIP.

For many of us a quick “K” or “LOL” text message constitutes an entire conversation. While it is convenient to be able to get your point across in three letters or less, those shorthand responses have robbed us of an important skill: small talk. How often do you see someone who is obviously waiting for another person, furiously texting so they don’t look alone? Before cell phones, you may have turned to the person next to you and chatted until your friend arrived.

Networking is the business equivalent of small talk; a powerful tool that requires you to talk to complete strangers. While asking about their hobbies, or their children’s sports teams may seem like an easy task, it can be paralyzing for someone who is used to communicating in front of a screen.

So how do you get back the power of small talk? Prepare a list of generic questions that you can ask anyone. Knowing that you have something to say will ease your anxiety. If you know who will be at the event, do some research ahead of time and think of questions you want to ask specific people. Being familiar with a person, even over the Internet, will give you more confidence when talking to them face-to-face.