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National Coming Out Day

10/9/2014

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National Coming Out Day was founded on October 11, 1988, in celebration of the second gay march on Washington D.C. a year earlier. The purpose of the march and of National Coming Out Day is to promote awareness of gay, bisexual, lesbian and transgender issues and to celebrate being LGBT. Although National Coming Out Day is a time to celebrate gay pride, many choose this day to come out to their parents, friends, co-workers, and themselves. I plan to celebrate this day as an ally; I am the parent of a gay child, and a friend of countless LGBT individuals. 

Why does National Coming Out Day matter? One out of every two Americans has someone close to them who is gay or lesbian. For transgender people, that number is one in ten. An astounding 92% of LGBT individuals hear negative messages about their sexual orientation (HRC Youth Survey Report). Because every person deserves to live and work in a safe and accepting environment, I am encouraging my friends and colleagues to support the effort, to not be a bystander when someone uses language like “oh that’s so gay,” and to step in and say something if someone is being bullied in the workplace or at school.

When an LGBT person or their parent wants to talk to you about an issue, don’t shy away because you are afraid you might say the wrong thing. Silence and isolation are far worse than having a conversation or showing that you care, even if you don’t feel like you have the right words. I have friends who have admitted they don’t know how to talk to me about having a gay child because they fear they will say the wrong thing. To that I say, have the conversation and ask me questions. By being more open, we become more informed, our society becomes more accepting, and more active allies are born. According to the HRC Youth Survey Report, 42% of LGBT youth feel that the communities in which they live are not accepting, and 33% feel that their families are not accepting. National Coming Out Day isn’t about setting aside a day to “come out,” it’s about raising awareness and supporting the LGBT community – they are our family, neighbors, and our coworkers. 

Almost everyone has a story about coming out, or about the day a family member or co-worker came out. What’s yours? Share it with us. Chances are we will all be stronger allies because of it.

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    Anne Saile

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